A Warm Up Visit

A WARM UP VISIT

 

Seventh Sunday after Pentecost – July 7, 2013

Isaiah 66: 10-14

Galatians 6: 1-16

Luke 10: 1-11, 16-20

 

                Well, it has been a quiet week in Lake Wobegon, my hometown.  The streets and houses all seem to be deserted.  There’s still traffic on Main Street, but no one ever stops.  It’s summer people, travelling from the twin cities to their headwaters camp in northern Minnesota.  They don’t even blink an eye when they pass through Lake Wobegon.  They think Bud’s prices for gas at the Sinclair station are way too high, but Bud has to pay a hefty price to get the gas delivered.  They’re all in too much of a hurry to stop at Bertha’s Bagel and Brew; where you can get a bagel and coffee for breakfast, a bagel and root beer for lunch, and a bagel and a Wendy’s beer for dinner.  So Bertha has threatened to move her shop to St. Cloud.  That would be just another on the long list of businesses that have either left town for greener pastures or just gone under.

                There aren’t many Lake Wobegonians left in town either.  With the Fourth of July holiday in the middle of the week, folks took the whole week off and headed for their camps along the lake where it’s just a little bit cooler than the pavement and sidewalks in town.  Yes, it does get hot in central Minnesota.  They say we have two seasons: winter, from September to May when it’s not unusual to have consecutive weeks of temperatures below 0 degrees; and road construction season, June through August, when 90 degree temperatures and 90% humidity will melt the winter fat out your pores like Minnehaha Falls.

                Clarence Bunson, out at his camp on the lake, cranked up the radio when he heard “Hot town, summer in the city,” thinking John Sebastian must have visited Lake Wobegon  when he wrote that.  And he pretended that he felt a little bit cooler, even though there was no breeze coming off the lake.

                Those left in town weren’t opening their doors or coming out of their homes, and it wasn’t just because they had their air conditioners pumping away.  Telephones were ringing all around town as the rumor spread that the JWs were canvassing, you know – the Jehovah’s Witnesses, going from house to house, knocking on doors or ringing door bells.  Or maybe it was the Mormons?  They couldn’t tell them apart.  In any case, the German Catholics of Our Lady of Perpetual Responsibility and the Norwegian Lutherans of Lake Wobegon Lutheran Church were in united cooperation of pretending they weren’t home.

                But the visitors were never fooled.  They could hear the conversations behind closed doors.  Mothers would yell at their children, “Don’t open the door!”  Kids would ask, “Why not?”  Mothers would answer, “Because they are proselytizers.”  Kids would say, “What’s that?”  Mothers would answer, “They are a threat to our religion.”  Kids would say, “But we never even go to church.”  Mothers would say, “If we don’t answer, they’ll eventually leave.”

                And so it went on.  It sure was quiet in Lake Wobegon.

                David Engqvist is now retired three years from his 38 year tenure as the pastor at Lake Wobegon Lutheran Church.  He and his wife, Judy, still live in town, but he tries not to interfere much with the ministry of the new pastor, Pastor Liz, a young (oh, oh) woman (boo) from New Jersey (oh God!).  He’s filled in for her when she’s away on vacation, but mostly he lets her make her own mistakes, learning the way he did from his.

                Pastor Engqvist always wanted someone to coming knocking at his door, but in all that time it never happened.  It was as if the proselytizers knew the field of Lake Wobegon wasn’t ripe for the harvest, even though there was a lot of white on the top of the stalks, doncha know.  But now, that rumored couple was coming up his sidewalk and about to ring his door bell.

                Pastor Engqvist opened his front door and was surprised to see Al and Jean Swanson standing there.  He remembered when Al and Jean joined Lake Wobegon Lutheran about four years ago.  They were both recently retired and moved to Lake Wobegon to get away from the hustle and bustle of the city.  No one ever told him they had become Jehovah’s Witnesses.

                “Why, Pastor Engqvist!” said Al, “We didn’t know this is where you and Mrs. Engqvist lived.  Well, I guess we don’t need to share much with you.”

                But the pastor was hoping they would stay and talk.  He had prepared for this moment for so long.  His plan was to first invite them to pray together, because Jehovah’s Witnesses aren’t allowed to pray with heathens.  Pastor Engqvist remembered his youth in the Wisconsin Synod of the Lutheran Church when he had been taught to never recite the Lord’s Prayer in public because even some who called themselves Lutheran weren’t truly-believing Lutherans.  So they would have to explain why they couldn’t pray together and he would be ready for that.  Then, using his limited memory of Biblical Hebrew, he would explain how there really was no such word as ‘Jehovah’; that it was a trans-scripted combination of the consonants of the name of ‘Yahweh’ and the vowel points of the word ‘Adonai,’ reminding faithful Jews not to pronounce the divine name, but read ‘Lord God’ instead.  That would shock them.  Then he would counter their dark, apocalyptic theology of the sinful world and God’s final destruction with the good news of the love and forgiveness of Jesus and the promise of eternal life to all.

                “Please, come inside.  I will pour you a cup of coffee and we’ll talk,” invited Pastor Engqvist.  “Oh, no coffee for us,” said Jean.  “That’s right!” thought David, “They probably don’t do caffeine.”  “It’s too hot for coffee,” Jean continued, “How about some lemonade?”

                While Pastor Engqvist poured three lemonades, Al began his well-rehearsed speech, “As you know, we are going from house to house in Lake Wobegon…”  “Oh, yes,” Pastor Engqvist interrupted, “Word is getting around that the Jehovah’s Witnesses are in town.”

                Al and Jean looked at each other and nervously chuckled, “Jehovah’s Witnesses?  No, we’re from Lake Wobegon Lutheran.  You know that.”

                “Then why this door to door thing?” asked the perplexed pastor.  “Lutherans don’t do that kind of thing!”

                Al then explained, “Pastor Liz shared with our Bible study group the Gospel story of Jesus sending out the seventy in pairs to spread the message of Jesus, and she thought that we could try that right here in Lake Wobegon.  She was hoping that 70 people would come to her training session, but Jean and I were the only ones to show up.  But we still wanted to do it, even if by ourselves, because we’ve always been, well, impressed with folks like the Jehovah’s Witnesses and the Mormons who are so convicted about their beliefs and who follow the Biblical example that Jesus himself offered.”

                Now Pastor Engqvist was curious, “But why do that in Lake Wobegon where everybody is already either Lutheran or Catholic, or those Sanctified Brethren in the barn outside of town and none of them are going to change?”

                “First,” said Al, “It’s not about proselytizing and conversion.  It’s about invitation and offering help to meet the needs in our community.  We’re really proud of our little church.  You established a long-lasting foundation of faithfulness and now Pastor Liz is challenging us with some new ideas and new ways of doing things.  It’s really quite exciting to be part of Lake Wobegon Lutheran Church.  Pastor Liz described this as more of a survey to find out what people are looking for from our church and how we can meet their needs and concerns.  She calls it ‘Together to Gather.’  Pretty clever, isn’t it?”

                “And second,” added Jean, “More and more people, even in Lake Wobegon, don’t have any church connection at all.  And we want people to know that Jesus and Lake Wobegon Lutheran cares about them too.  But it sure is hard to share the word when no one is home.”

                “Oh, they’re home,” said Pastor Engqvist, “Just give me a chance to make a few phone calls and I think you’’ see more doors being opened unto you.”

                And with that hope, Al and Jean went on to the next house.

                “Maybe Liz is right,” thought the old pastor, “It’s a different world out there today.  We could all learn a lesson, not from the door-knockers and bell-pushers, but from Jesus to be missionaries of invitation and assistance to those who strayed from the path.”

                As David cranked up his air conditioner, he yelled across the room to his wife, Judy, “It seems like things might start to heat up around here!”

 

And that’s the news from Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good looking, and all the children are above average.  AMEN.